By Susan K. Boyd MS, MFT~
Most people want to feel like they belong. Human nature moves individuals with the desire to be a part of something bigger than them selves; this might be a relationship such as marriage, friendship or family. It could mean joining a church, or organization where people have a common goal or ideology. Even for the loner, living off the grid, high in the mountains, belonging may mean being a part of nature.
A sense of belonging connects people-to one another, or to anything, that holds value for them. They don’t feel alone or unimportant. Belonging gives life meaning. What can people do to feel connected if they aren’t sure where to start?
The Central Coast is a great place to belong. Opportunities are everywhere for those willing to venture out and try things on for size. The Newcomers Club is an easy way to meet people who share common interests. For instance, the Estero Newcomer’s Club offers members a choice of groups they can join within the club, like kayaking, golf, walking, wine tasting, painting, gardening, Canasta, travel and a long list of other activities. Members join for a few dollars a year and are never pressured to attend meetings. This is a perfect scenario for reluctant joiners.
Churches are eager and welcoming to visitors and new members. They come in a variety of denominations on the Central Coast offering support to the members and to the community. Churches are all about worship but also about reaching out to help those in need. Walking in and sitting in on a service, then talking with people at the coffee time afterwards, is a good way to experience the life of a congregation.
For those that own businesses and are too busy working to socialize, the Chamber of Commerce in any of the local towns is worth joining each year. Most of them, once a month, offer breakfast, lunch or meet and-greet dinner to help members network around a meal, usually, including a special guest speaker on a topic of interest to business owners. The Chamber also services more than businesses but the community at large. Anyone who walks through the door will be given literature and magazines listing clubs, organizations and places to go and see in that area. The chamber of Commerce is a rich source of information, helping people make connections.
Belonging is vital. Many people watched one or two political conventions in July. They may have felt included or, possibly, alienated. August, however, is the month of the Olympics! Americans, who were divided into two camps last month, come together into one, this month. Here is the moment, when all those who love America, may have a sense of belonging, even if the athletes are not their family or friends running on the field, or diving in the water. Some people will be at home, cheering in front of their flat screen TVs, while others may be gymnasts flying through the air at the games in Brazil. But all Americans can enjoy feeling like they belong to each other, once, again.
Susan K. Boyd is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in SLO. She can be reached for counseling by telephone: (782) 9800 or by email: [email protected]. Also see www.susankboydmft.com.
