Through Their Eyes

Senior-Couple-UKBy Susan K. Boyd

How do we look at the world and those in it?  While we rush from one project to another, do we forget to see people? Projects can, quickly, become more important than people, because of our perpetual busyness.
If we want to learn how to slow down, and enjoy others, all we have to do is watch the very young and the very old.  Toddlers, for example, see grandparents walking toward them and they don’t see anything else. The children run, not walk, with their arms up in the air, and their eyes fixed on the faces of the people they love. The little ones want to show grandma or grandpa their room or a picture they just drew.  They don’t see wrinkled faces and slow bodies. They see people who want to spend time with them and share their world for a little while.
The elderly, on the other hand, have been where we are, living a schedule of lists, calendars and deadlines. But as their pace is slowing down and their world is getting smaller, they enjoy, and appreciate, relationships on a deeper level. They look at family and friends as precious and rare gifts. Days are longer but life is shorter. They see what we may not recognize; each moment experienced with a loved one can become a snapshot logged in the memory. The memory may fade, but the warm feeling of the relationship stays in the mind’s eye and is like a buried treasure in the heart.
So, how can we change the way we view others? Maybe, we need to resist thinking of people as obstacles in our day or as time wasters. The toddler and the seasoned life traveler, both, esteem the people they love. Their relationships are believed to be invaluable. They look forward to seeing friends and family. They just, somehow, know it is going to be a great time together!  Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could see one another through their eyes?

Susan K. Boyd is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in private practice in SLO. She can be reached for counseling at (805) 782-9800 or by email at . Also see susankboydmft.com