By Susan K. Boyd MS, MFT
School Days are here again; happy people are buying school supplies, school clothes and looking forward to a new Fall schedule. But no one is looking forward to bullies being back in school.
I will be speaking at a world conference in September on Breaking Free from Bullies: Helping Children and Adolescents be Strong and Be Kind. I thought it might be helpful to share, with you, what bullying is and isn’t, and some of the newest information on what is being done to handle the bullying in schools, today.
The definition of bullying, itself, has been evolving over time. Dr. Daniel Olweus came up with a definition that is widely used. It stresses three components: 1) aggressive behaviors 2) those behaviors are repeated 3) and involve a power imbalance favoring the perpetrator. The victim is not able to defend against the negative behaviors of one or more of the perpetrators. In other words, two kids getting into a fight, may, or may not, necessarily, mean anyone was being bullied.
The Center for Disease Control and Prevention in their report on Bullying Surveillance Among Youth, stipulates in their definition of bullying, the aggressive behaviors only need to have the likelihood aggression will be repeated. The Center describes two modes of bullying: Direct: aggressive behavior occurring in the presence of the targeted youth, Indirect: aggressive behavior not directly communicated to the targeted youth, such as rumors.
The Center also describes three types of bullying: Physical: such as hitting, kicking, punching, tripping and pushing, Verbal Oral or Written: such as calling names, taunting, threatening, offensive notes, offensive hand gestures, and inappropriate sexual comments, Relational: efforts to isolate and keep the targeted youth from peers by ignoring the youth, or posting embarrassing images in a physical or electronic space, without the youth’s permission.
Forty-nine states have passed anti-bullying legislation, with that, comes expectations that schools will implement anti-bullying programs. For instance, in 2008 California passed a law, directly related to cyber-bullying, which gave school administrators authority to discipline students for bullying others offline or online.
California, in 2013 clarified the role of schools in bullying cases that originate away from school. They described the ‘Electronic act’, “to mean the creation and transmission originated on or off the school site.” There is some controversy whether anti-bullying programs have worked.
But schools with anti-bullying success stories, have been those that involved kids in launching, and maintaining, pro-kindness campaigns. When a school culture is proactively protective, bullies are noticed and disciplined. And when students are part of the solution, they feel empowered knowing their efforts made a difference.
Susan K. Boyd is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in private practice in SLO. She can be reached for counseling at (805) 782-9800 or by email: [email protected]. Also, see www.susankboydmft.com.
