By Michael Elliott ~
Poly B’Golly
How udderly (Ag school) refreshing to see Cal Poly’s football team give us chills and thrills on two consecutive weekends! The Mustang’s stunning, last minute upset over FCS powerhouse Montana in the Grizzlies’ rollicking stadium was startling. Yes, pile on the adjectives. Please. Poly got a cracker, uncle, as placekicker Alex Vega kicked the winning field goal in the waning moments.
But the poise and effort the ‘Stangs exhibited the following weekend in Tempe, Arizona against Pac-12 powerhouse Arizona State were just as impressive. Cal Poly entered the fourth quarter tied with the 35-point favorite Sun Devils before succumbing 35-21. Great job men!
First Impressions
Excepting Monday night’s doubleheader, let’s see what week one in the 2015 NFL season hath wrought: Well, speaking of rot, the Raiders stunk it up with an abysmal showing against the Cincinnati Bengals as Oakland’s new regime got manhandled. It’s early, but the NFC West may not be anointed to Seattle quite yet as the Seahawks were knocked off by the St. Louis Rams and the Arizona Cardinals showed some brass, um, fortitude in sinking the Saints. Stay tuned.The Buffalo Bills could be a team on the rise as they flummoxed All-Pro quarterback Andrew Luck of the Colts into two unusual-for-Andrew interceptions in the 27-14 victory. Just sayin’, but the Cleveland Browns could be in for another long year when QB Johnny “Show Me The Money” Manziel was their leading rusher with 35 yards in an opening loss to the Jets.
The Dallas drama continued on as Tony Romo directed a late 72-yard touchdown drive against the Giants and stunned the New Yawkers with an 11-yard touchdown pass to Jason Witten with but seven seconds remaining for the 27-26 victory. The Cowboy faithful just pray that this is the year Romo bucks his trend of poor play during post-season competition, if they advance that far.
Week one MVP honors must be bestowed upon Tennessee Titan rookie Marcus Mariota as he hurled four touchdown passes against the Tampa Bay Succaneers (not a misspelling) and prevailed in his highly anticipated matchup against number one pick and fellow rookie Jameis Winston. And yes, contrary to popular belief, hurling is not relegated strictly to over-indulging college students in downtown SLO.
Oddities
Why do professional tennis players ask the ball boys/girls for three tennis balls to choose from prior to serving one of two balls? Can they really discern the difference? How rare is it to see tattoos on professional golfers? How rare is it to not see tats on pro baseball players?
That sloping isthmus of land in dead centerfield which is in play just inside the fence of Minute Maid Park in Houston is a broken ankle just waiting to happen. Why are their 14 teams in the Big Ten Conference? Can golfer Jordan Spieth’s play of late be in correlation with the Dow Jones Industrial and S & P 500’s current market correction? Very odd to have witnessed tennis coaches being allowed to go on court to mentor their subjects between games at the recent women’s professional Bank Of The West tournament in Palo Alto.
Is British golfer Ian Poulter rock icon Rod Stewart’s son or does it just appear so? Let’s stay British, mum, and envision a top triathlete at the Hawaiian Ironman Triathlon girding for the finish line and queuing up Black Sabbath’s “Iron Man” to help push him/her across. I dear say!
And Finally…
“McDonald’s, may I help you?” “Yes, I would like to have an Egg McMuffin, hold the McMuffin. And give me a crow sandwich to go along with it. #*%^_@”<!+#@%^#”* SERENA!” (I picked you to go all the way, girlfriend).
Please enlighten Michael with ways to extract bird feathers from his pie hole at [email protected]
